Friday, November 4, 2011

Coke Bottle Lighting!

Who would have thought?
Something as simple as a 2 liter Coke bottle...some water...and some chlorine.

What do you get?
No, not a carbonation fountain.
No, not a new way to play Spin-the-Bottle.

What you get is a creative, low cost way to put lighting in third world homes that are otherwise dealing with darkness almost all day!

It's green, it's safe, it's ecologically friendly, it brings work to small towns.

In all, it's really worth checking out!

See here.

In fact, the e-mail I received about it said:
This is really interesting and very exciting for these poor people! The simplicity of this concept is fantastic!Used plastic bottles filled with water + a tablespoon of bleach,
Will light up people's lives.

Thanks, Dad.

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

I don’t really ‘hate’ Root beer.

You might recall in a previous post that I mentioned how I got my son to drink root beer. Well, I didn’t ‘get’ him to drink it, I opened a can of it thinking it was Cream soda, and I understand the look on my face was a hysterical picture of horror when I learned I had grabbed the wrong can off the shelf. (Damn store-brand soda!)

My exact words, if I recall, was “Root beer! I HATE Root beer!” Followed by my son’s first gulp of the beverage.

In truth, I don’t “HATE” root beer. I just don’t like it. It takes a lot to get me to HATE something. But I DO hate some things. Let me see if I can think of any:

1 –Rudeness – this is a major pet peeve of mine. It takes virtually NO effort to be pleasant. You don’t have to be an award winning cheermeister…but I smile or a kind word is SO easy to do. Do you have any idea how much effort goes into being nasty? You can’t possibly be a jerk and not know you are doing it. If you don’t know you are doing it, you are a BIGGER jerk…and it’s still inexcusable.

2 – Bullies – Ok, this is NOT because I was always the smallest, ugliest kid in the classroom. No, really. But in general, I think Bullying is “1a” to #1 above. Using your position of strength (physical or otherwise) to humble those who literately cannot stand up to you is unconscionable. I’d like to think for every bully there is a Big Guy waiting to kick his ass. This is only true 50% of the true…

3 – Traffic – Not the band, but rather the long line of cars that are not moving. (If you were born before 1975 you likely never heard of Traffic, and probably WOULD hate them…) Here is my beef with traffic: I understand that accidents ‘happen’. It’s the long line of people NOT in the accident that have to stop and stare at it. GET OUT OF MY WAY! I don’t care who got hurt, or why. Odds are, they are ok. If they are not, odds are there is a nice policeman handling it. If you are rubbernecking at something on the other side of the highway, you should be dragged out of your car and beaten. Sorry, I’m in a bit of a rush…

4 – the Commercialization of X-mas – In and of itself, Christmas is a nice idea. As a kid, it was about peace and love and harmony. Today, it’s about the long, long line of people I am obligated to buy presents for. *sigh*. Please, for the love of Baby Jesus, do not buy me a gift. And in return, I won’t feel obligated to buy YOU a gift. And now we can be friends without that awkward “what kind of present do I have to hope they will like that is not expensive or hard to get?” Don’t get me wrong, I LIKE to buy presents for my friends…but I don’t want to feel like I HAVE to because it’s late December. I don’t want YOU to feel that way, either.

5 – Crowds - yeah, I need some room, please. I don’t know you well enough to have your hands anywhere near my butt, nor do I want to smell your breath or have you step on my new sneakers. Again. If I can’t turn around without head-butting a stranger, then I am likely NOT somewhere I am normally comfortable being.

6 – Parades – I know, I know…Really, I’m a nice fun-loving guy. I really am! But standing around watching people dressed up as…as…geez what ARE these gals dressed up as? And why are they waving to me? Hi, hello, yes…move on. Ok, so I stand here and just watch these giant balloons walk by? But that would put me in a CROWD (see above). And I have to stand still for this long line of dressed up people and large balloons? Oh MAN. How long IS this line anyway…?

7 – Cold Weather - as a New Jersey resident, you would think that I would be used to the changing seasons. You would think that I would welcome the change every 3 months. I don’t. I don’t like to be cold. I’d rather be too warm than even a LITTLE cold. I don’t ski, I don’t snow board, I don’t watch Live Football. I don’t like to shovel snow, I don’t like to fall down in snow. I don’t like to go sledding. Why not sledding? BECAUSE THERE IS SNOW! My take on Winter has become very general over the years: If I can’t take off my shirt, catch a tan and enjoy this cold beer, I’m disappointed. If I can see my breath and have to dress in layers, I’m angry. In fact, that’s the REAL sticking point: Jacket = no problem. Gloves, scarves, boots, ear muffs and/or a hat? DONE. Heading to Florida…

8 – Reality shows about rich, stupid people – this may have become my biggest pet peeve as of late. First off, there are many more Hot Women on this planet that TV will ever show you. Just because your daddy is rich, does NOT mean you are ‘celebrity’ material. Kim Kardashian – tell me again what your skill set is? Right, I thought so. Paris Hilton – tell me again what your skill set is? Right you are sister! These 2 ‘daughters of the rich’…along with the 10,000 other wanna bees that MTV has churned out…are embarrassing. And they are too stupid to BE embarrassed, which is MORE embarrassing. Please Please Please just shut up and try on some perfume over THERE….
But wait, that’s not all! Now, if you are a wealthy ‘house wife’ you get on TV, too! Hey, if you have 8 kids at once…if you are a washed up B-level actress and/or if you were married to anyone who was wealthy and then went to jail…you get a TV show! YAY YOU!!! Now you get to PROVE that Americans will watch anything that features a size 2 girl wearing mascara!

BLEAUGHGHGH! I'll wash you reality tv twits with a nice cold Root Beer.

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Nothing to do with Soda

My friend Ashley has a hilarious Blog. I suppose it's even MORE hilarious to people who know her well. But it cracks me up. It's here.

On the blog is a list of 90 really random facts about her.
Today I told her I was going to copy the list and re-write it to me really random facts about ME.

Expecting her to tell me how immature that would be, I was instead given the 'go ahead'.
So I went ahead.

Without any further ado, here are "90 really random facts about me" :
1. I've been cooking since I was 10 when I deemed my father’s cooking God Awful at best.
2. I love to wear Black. And no, I’m not Gothic. I’m not Johnny Cash either.
3. I’ve only been a “best man” in one wedding, and I had to share the honor with another ‘best friend’. So I guess I was the ‘Second Best Man’. .
4. My kids are gorgeous. No, really…
5. I only have a handful of people I call ‘Good Friends’. But I like everyone else all the same.
6. I'm not big on talking on the phone. I’d rather text or e-mail so I can multi-task.
7. I am not a single parent, although my kids try hard to make my wife and I consider it.
8. I have little patience for stupid people.
9. If I could live right off of a million dollar trust fund and eat Taco Bell twice a week, my life would be perfect.
10. I like my job but hate the shit pay. I'm still here because I can’t decide what I want to be when I grow up.
11. I am not a manly man
12. I've always lived in NJ
13. I do not take pictures. I’ve got a pretty good memory. Pictures make me sad.
14. If it breaks, there's a 90% chance I will break it
15. I'm not allergic to anything.
16. I sing when I drive, and when I play in bands I insist on getting some mic time.
17. I drive my kid crazy because I know all the words to almost all the songs on the radio, and take great pleasure in re-writing them to something silly or offensive.
18. I like to kid around... it sometimes gets me in trouble
19. If I don't like you, you won’t know it because I will ignore you. In fact, I will make you invisible.
20. I am terrified of pain.
21. I’m REALLY terrified of growing so old and feeble that I’ll drool and have to be taken care of 24/7.
22. I absolutely hate sitting in traffic.
23. 1/3 of the people who graduate college aren't using their major. I’m a management major, so I guess I win.
24. I hate going to see family on the holidays.
25. I am the voice of reason.
26. I will not eat anything that someone offers me if the sentence is prefaced by “Taste this. Does this taste spoiled to you?”
27. My favorite color is black. Next is dark blue. Pretty chipper, huh?
28. I have a phobia about eating the ‘last’ or ‘first’ of anything. (lets thank my ex-step mother for that one)
29. I am an very good speller … but I prefer to rush thru my assignments and therefore typos abound
30. my kids are somewhat picky eaters…but they are improving each year
31. I like raw tomatoes
32. I can take or leave dogs, and I don’t ever want to own one.
33. I don’t mind getting flowers … it just never happened because I’m “the guy” in the relationship.
34. I've been to Florida many, many times.
35. I like to learn new things...if I can right away apply them to something.
36. I am pretty good at math, and prefer to NOT use a calculator if I can get away with it.
37. Deep down, I'm a 4 year old boy named “Jody”
38. I’ll take rain on a hot summer day over snow on ANY given day….any given day.
39. If there's something I want to buy I go ahead and buy it. I don’t “shop”. I also don’t buy myself much.
40. There is not a natural blonde anywhere in my family.
41. I would love to have a vegetable garden one day
42. I rarely read instruction manuals
43. I don't mind change AND I adapt well
44. I have never owned a turtle. Or a lizard.
45. I love the smell of laundry soap
46. I'm right handed, but my favorite relative of all time was lefty
47. I hate to wear sandals or flip-flops, and won’t. No matter how hot it is outside.
48. I listen to heavy metal, rock, rap and soft rock... often in the same ride.
49. I think having 2 kids is enough. Really.
50. I still bite my nails
51. I don't smoke, and cannot see the point in doing it.
52. Between my kids and myself we can go through 2 gallons of Apple Juice a week
53. When I'm overtired I get a headache. Then I get very cranky.
54. If there's nothing good on TV, I shut the TV off. I’m also very critical about what constitutes “good”.
55. I read. A lot
56. I tell my family that I love them. I tired that with my friends, but it felt awkward and the reception was lukewarm at best.
57. I wanted to dye my hair midnight blue when I was 20, but chickened out.
58. I can take or leave when girls wear lipstick
59. I will go fishing, but only for the beer, sun and wind in my face.
60. I have a comic book collection
61. I like melted peanut butter on my pancakes…especially when mixed with syrup
62. I could eat Taco Bell or Chinese Food every single day
63. I am very organized
64. I love the book The Stand
65. When I'm in a bad mood I dont want to be cheered up until I'm good & ready.
66. I am really bad at wrapping gifts and prefer to just not do it.
67. I don't like to drink milk
68. My brother and I both insist that our parents favored the other one growing up.
69. I can whistle
70. I had a song I wrote played on college radio for a while back in 1989
71. I miss my grandparents like crazy
72. I don't like strawberry flavored milk
73. I never had a pet lamb, pet cat or pet hamster
74. I only tasted Guacamole about a year ago.
75. Still hate it
76. My desk at work is pretty organized, but could be more so
77. After the house key and the car key, everything else on a key chain is crap
78. I love sushi and wish my kids would try it
79. I don't wear deodorant every day, because I never sweat. I’m not a pig…just weird glands.
80. I'm not a perfectionist, and I know it bites me in the ass sometimes
81. I wear jeans & sneakers as often as I can
82. Obama & Clinton rank very high on the list of ‘Presidents I really don’t like’
83. When I write, my imagination is very vivid. Like I already saw the movie in my head…
84. I think Nutella is DEEEEE-licious
85. I miss my spice rack
86. I am terribly lazy, but I do try.
87. I am nothing like I appear to be
88. I can be painfully insecure
89. I dont think I blush very easily...but I'm very modest
90. I wish I put my creativity to better use.

Saturday, April 30, 2011

How opening a can of Whoopass can mean Free Shipping

Ok, so kick the above link and FREE Ground shipping on Whoopass.

Man, I just love to say that word: Whoopass.

LOL! Say it with me: Whoopass


Friday, March 11, 2011

Diet Pepsi's Skinny Can

Look! Diet Pepsi makes a can and calls it "skinny". How clever! Unfortunately, there are many in the fashion world that aren't pleased or humoured.
Jill Beraud, chief marketing officer for PepsiCo said in a statement, "Our slim, attractive new can is the perfect complement to today's most stylish looks..."
Jonathan Asher, senior vice president at Perception Research Services International has a different take: It feels like a cheap shot to get publicity and it would be a shame if that’s what it was. I don’t think calling this can the skinny can and associating it with Fashion Week is going to do much to contribute to the very serious problem of eating disorders...”
I ask you to take the can in context. Pepsi isn't saying that the thin can will make you thin. Diet Pepsi has been around for 40 years...we KNOW it wont be a suitable substitute for fruit and vegetables or water. It's a sexy looking can, and EVERY company worth it's salt tries to package their product in a way that is appealing!
Of course, choosing to use 'Fashion Week' as the time and place to make it's debut is clever/not clever. If you are going to make a statement in front of a group that takes eating disorders have to brace yourself for the backlash. Sure, it's a media coup...but it looks like some non-fans were made!
Remember - the soda INSIDE tastes the same. So judge the can in stride and remember to drink wisely...especially if you are dieting.