Thursday, May 7, 2009

Tell Coca Cola that American Idol is dead

Coca Cola ought to pull the plug on those red cups sitting on the American Idol judging panel. This show has completely gone to hell.
They ought to instead invest in something a little more worthwhile.

But I'm not here today to talk about how or where Coke should advertise.
I'm here to tell you why I stopped watching American Idol.

In fairness, you should know that it's not like I stopped watching 2 weeks ago.
In fact, I stopped watching about 2 weeks into this season.
So if you want to debate why I hate Adam or why I think the cute girl with the pink streaks in her hair should still be on the show...I've only got a limited amount of ammo.

But it's the Big Picture that I hate, not the specific effeminate boys or badly tuned chicks.

I hate the first 5 weeks of Auditions.
Really...who cares?! It's just 5 weeks of watching nameless, faceless people smile, cry and occasionally act like Special Ed students.
You want to make Audition week/month compelling? How about we do AWAY with the retard scenes and spend more time on the back stories of the people WORTH seeing? Make me interested in them so I CARE if they make it to Hollywood and I CARE about voting...

I hate the addition of a 4th Judge.
Don't get me wrong; she's nice and she's personable and she knows what she is talking about.
But the math stinks.
4 judges means a tie is always possible. And if there is a tie, Simon breaks it.
But Simon already VOTED, so what sense does THAT make?
In the Senate, the Vice President breaks a tie. He doesn't get 2 votes. He only votes if there is a tie.
Once Simon gives you his opinion, it's as good as made unless all 3 vote against him.
Senseless. It reeks of Ego.
It reeks of Stupidity, too.

I hate the contradictory advice.
If you sing like the original artist they tell you that you need to "make it your own", and if you make it your own, they tell you that you can't out-do a classic and you ought to stay true to the original.
If you sing something you are good at, they tell you to expand your horizons and stretch, and if you go outside of your comfort zone they tell you that you are out of your league and ought to stick with what you are good at.

I hate the introduction of the 'one save' rule, which pretty much says if you get voted off, the judges can say 'well, we know that you will make money for this Record Label so we want you to stay any way...'.

I hate the fact that 90% of the kids on the show excel at Rhythm & Blues...which I hate.

BIG PROPS go to Chris Daughtrey, who got voted off too early and then made the best album to ever come from an American Idol contestant. Big Props go to David Cook, who deserved to win (I can't stand David Archuletta) and made an Awesome Album. Big Props go to Carrie Underwood. I don't like New Country, and I liked Bo Bice better...but I know she's great at it!

But as far as this season goes? I couldn't get past 2 weeks of this season, and I have no intention of trying next season. Please, for God Sake, don't let there BE a next season. 2 Nights per week of this unwatchable nonsense is enough...

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